From all over, especially in schools, culture pressures everyone to have a date.  They constantly ask if you have a crush in elementary, and you are totally weird if you don’t have a date in high school.  It is constant pressure and sometimes don’t you just want to take a step back and actually look at the opposite sex as a person and not a satisfaction of your feelings?  Don’t get me wrong I’m not saying having feelings for the opposite sex is wrong, but culture constantly throws it in our faces that it would be a relief to get a breath of fresh air and stop trying to impress that guy/girl.  Well that is what I’ve decided.  I have decided not to date in high school.  Okay you might be freaking out and think I must be some weird home school freak.  Well I kinda am. 😉  But that is not why I’ve decided to do this.  I have four reasons…

1. I want deep friendships

I’m sure you can agree with me when you’re dating you want to impress your boyfriend/girlfriend.  It’s typical and it’s not wrong within boundaries.  But how can I truly get to know him or he get to know me if we are always trying to be impressive.  I don’t know about you but that’s got to get tiring.  I want to have the freedom to be me.  And who else than my friends am I more “me” around.  By not dating in high school I can use that time to develop true and deep friendships.  I can get to know guys and girls for who they are and show them who I truly am.  What makes me so sad is that whenever people date and then break up it totally ruins the friendship and makes any conversation awkward.  So even though you get to see each other every day at school you can’t be friends anymore because you don’t “like” each other. Whereas if you were just friends who cares whether or not you “like” each other, you’re still friends.  I am going to live with my future spouse for the rest of my life and he will be my best friend.  I want to use this time to develop true friendships so when the time does come along I can truly know whether or not this is the guy for me.

2. I’m not ready for marriage

The whole purpose of dating is to discern whether or not you want to marry that guy/girl.  And I am not going to get married in high school so why date?  Statistically only a small percentage of high school sweethearts even get married. And if they do, the marriage often ends in divorce.  So what’s the point if I’m not ready for marriage?  Like Jefferson Bethke said, “Dating with no intent is like going to the grocery store with no money.  You either leave unhappy or take something that isn’t yours.”

3. I need to grow in virtue

Even if there are no other reasons to not date in high school I can at least use the opportunity to practice the virtue of abstinence.  I can strengthen myself by not giving into high school pressure, so when I do start dating I will have the strength to not give in to the pressure of sex before marriage.  “Waiting is a sign of true love and patience.  Anyone can say ‘I love you,’ but not everyone can wait and prove their love is true.”

4. I’m not alone

You might be thinking by this point I’m going to be this lonely girl for four years of my life.  But there is someone that far exceeds the standards of any man. Jesus Christ.  Leslie Ludy said, “Until Jesus Christ is the obsession of your heart, you’ll always be looking to mere men to meet your needs that only He can fill.  Only when you make Jesus Christ your first love, will you be ready for a love story that reflects His glory.”  I love Jesus so much and want to spend this time growing in relationship with him.  There will come a point when God drops my future prince charming into my life but until then I will “Dance with God and He will let that perfect man cut in.”

Now after all this, this doesn’t mean I won’t have feelings for guys or even take a dance with one.  I’ll just be leaving room for the Holy Spirit and having fun. ;D

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